Last night Ava and I played a few hands of Gin Rummy and I was reminded of an embarrassing truth:
I can’t shuffle a deck of cards.
I don’t mean that I can’t shuffle like a casino dealer. I mean that I can’t shuffle at the level you’d expect from a small child without thumbs. Watching me try is as painful as it is amusing. I play cards with my parents and they laugh, but not without a hint of disappointment. “Maybe don’t do that in front of your friends,” my mother says lovingly.
My problem isn’t the absence of information. No one is keeping a secret from me. The problem is what I do know. I never learned the correct way, so I created my way.
Sure, I could re-learn. But that would first require me to unlearn. And that’s something I just don’t have the patience for.
You should see them. Other people when it’s my turn to deal. They watch me claw at the cards like a lobster doing origami. They offer to help, but it’s always with the rest of the table watching. Imagine walking across a busy intersection while the hand is blinking red and a stranger tells you, “Hey, you’re not walking right. You need to go back and learn how to crawl. Make the cars wait.”
My one point of solace, the thing I can hide behind, is the Underhand Shuffle. This is where you grab the deck loosely and toss sections of the cards from one hand to the other. This is the way your Grandmother might shuffle if her arthritis were to flare up. Another variation of this is the Hindu Shuffle, which is basically the same thing, except you add a fancy flair of the wrist like you’re about to perform a disappointing magic trick. Both of these styles are as ineffective as they are unimpressive.
The style you see performed by most capable human beings is called the Riffle Shuffle. The Riffle Shuffle has two parts. First, you use a Dealer’s Grip, where you place your thumbs on the top corners of the split deck, and use your knuckles to create a bend in the cards. Once the bend is in place, you let the tops of the cards cascade into each other from the opposite hand, creating a fanning sound of tension.
Next—and this where things get exciting—is the Bridge Action. This is where the cards are gracefully scooped and bent the other direction, just before falling like a waterfall back into itself, ringing out the sound of resolve.
(There is another method called the One-Handed Faro, where the deck is cut, bent, and shuffled all in one hand. Best to not play cards with someone who has mastered this.)
Now that I’ve properly explained what everyone but me already understands, I want to point out that the key to the Riffle Shuffle is in the Dealer’s Grip. A successful shuffle, it didn’t start at the bend, nor at the bridge. It starts when your hands first make contact with the deck.
Because I never learned the Dealer’s Grip, I invented the Lobster Claw. Instead of using my thumbs, I use my long and scrawny pointer fingers. It’s this early childhood choice that haunts me. And it’s what stone walls me from getting any type of bridge action, or any chance of dealing the cards out smoothly when it’s my turn.
It’s this Lobster Claw approach. This learned behavior. This unfortunate muscle memory hammered into my hands. It’s what makes me 52X less effective at shuffling cards than every other man, woman, or child.
Whoever said, “what you don’t know will kill you,” got it wrong. It’s what you do know that causes all the trouble.
Untangling knots.
Rewinding the tape.
Stirring wet cement.
Shortcuts are great, but backtracks are a bitch. And the process of unlearning the wrong way is far more painful than spending extra time learning the correct way.
The Navy Seals say, “Slow is smooth and smooth is fast.” That’s how movements and behaviors become muscle memory. First slowly, then suddenly.
When learning something new this year, keep your training wheels on just a little longer. Hold onto that beginner’s mind just a little tighter. Because in the end, it might be the difference between doing a One-Handed Faro Shuffle and playing 52-card pick up by yourself.
A Few Things…
🎙 One of my goals this year is to become a better public speaker. I’ve been making the rounds on podcasts and just did my first ten-minute talk. You can watch the replay here. I have a hard time watching/listening to myself, but it’s been a good learning experience. Looking forward to watching this talk six months from now to see where I’ve improved.
I’m almost done updating my website with the list of all the podcast episodes I’ve done the last few months. If you want to browse the library, here’s that link: Media
I’ve been reading through the book, Speak Like Churchill, Stand Like Lincoln for tips on speaking, and it has some great lessons and stories. Though, what I’m finding is that public speaking is more baptism by fire.
✨ Creator Spotlight: Dickie Bush, creator of the “Ship 30 For 30 Online Writing Challenge”
This writing challenge is very cool and has kind of taken Twitter by storm for the last few months. The idea is simple: Write and share one “atomic essay” every day for a month. The beauty is that the essays are only 250ish words. And rather than stress over perfection, the goal is to unlock creativity and develop a regular writing habit. It’s also a great opportunity to meet other writers and build a community around your work.
“Shipping” work quickly and consistently has always been a major sticking point for me, so I’m looking forward to Shipping 30 in 30 for the month of February.
Dickie set up my subscribers with a special discount link, and I’d love for anyone interested to join me.
If you sign up, I’m happy to stay in touch and be an accountability buddy!
📚 Outside of the public speaking book, I’m reading Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina. I’ve always wanted to read it but was intimidated by the length, but when I saw it in a neighborhood “free little library” I took it as a sign.
I’m a hundred pages in (out of 700) and I’m really enjoying it. When a book 150 years old and still considered to be one of the best ever written, there’s usually a good reason.
If you’ve ever read it, I’d love to know what you thought.
Ok, that’s all I’ve got. Thanks for reading!
Until next time…
The temperature is good! 🔥
-Corey